(Before you start reading, you should know this story is based off our beloved bus driver and lunch monitor Dave!  You should also know this is all for jokes.  Hope you enjoy it! :)) 

Day 1 : The Last Straw

I wake up to another day, a day of Dave.  It is  early in the morning, and I start my day off by driving to the smelly bus station to make the horrifying trip of picking up the nasty, nasty teenagers.  As soon as these demon children get on the bus, they pester me yelling “Dave! Dave! Dave!”  And as they get off the bus they are still yelling, “Dave! Dave! Dave!”

I finally get to school, but what do I have to do next? I have to watch the teenagers eat lunch; but today is My Day of Dave.  I get a cupcake and a pile of fruit! It is Dave Dave Dave’s day!  I walk to a table and try and start a conversation with one of the kids, but what do I hear from the nasty kids? “Dave, Dave, Dave! Why can’t we eat that too! Dave, Dave, Dave!  We want all that too!”  They try to tear the cupcake out of my hand as I start to run away from the foul chants; but I trip.  “Dave, Dave, Dave!” they yell as I fall to the ground.  

When I get the nerve to look up I sadly see my cupcake smeared all over the wall.  I get up and cover my ears but the laughter just gets louder and louder by the second.  The giggles soften after what feels like a decade and I turn around to face those nasty kids, but as soon as I do I have trash offered to me like a present.  I sigh “No, No, No.” But all they do is ramble on and say, “but Dave, Dave, Dave! We want a cupcake too! We’ll watch your kid, we’ll give you food, we just want a cupcake too!”

I give up, and walk into the kitchen, only to be denied when I try to get a cupcake. I ponder what I should do next, but all I hear is “Dave! Dave! Dave! What about our cupcake! We want the icing, we want the cake.” I try to walk away, I try to ignore the pleads but all I hear is…………

“DAVE! DAVE! DAVE!”

We want this and we want that. Give us every sweet you got. I hear the bell and happily sigh. That’s the worst part of my Day of Dave.

But back on the bus, I have to go! And what do I hear! “DAVE! DAVE! DAVE!” I plug my ears, I look straight ahead.  Across the street I spot a  red light but I don’t care, I drive, drive, drive. A kid is on the wrong bus, oh well.  “Where are we now?” Asks a demon child. I grin and say “wouldn’t you like to know.”  I am driving, driving, driving; I look back and what do I see? The kid has poured all his food over my bus just because I didn’t answer him. I try to say “Please pick that up,” but what cuts me off? “DAVE! DAVE! DAVE! I didn’t mean to!” I finally get home and jump into bed. What a horrible day of dave. 

( That’s it for the first chapter…if you want to see what happens next stay tuned for the next issue of the Shaker Bision Newspaper!!!)